Moving forward with strength.

Hi ho, hi ho, back into matching we go….

Well, I guess technically we hadn’t left matching. But as it is, we {in agreement with our advisor at the agency} withdrew our profile from the family that was considering it.

I don’t know the exact date they received the profile, but I do know that they had it over 3 weeks total…probably closer to 4 or 5. Initially they were on vacation, then they just needed ‘a few more days’ to reach a decision, and in the end they ‘just hadn’t had time to talk about it.’ In the end, we decided that their inability to make a decision was the decision.

That last part was really frustrating to me…they had to know that our profile is only shown to one family at a time, so because they ‘didn’t have time’ to make a decision, we were sitting ducks for an entire month.

But, all we can do is move forward.

When I e-mailed with our agency advisor about our concerns, she agreed that we should withdraw and apologized for the delay.

Once we had that all settled, I felt like a switch had been flipped and some of the pressure building inside me was able to release. Then yesterday, I was thinking about how easy it is for me to get discouraged…to give in to the terror that this won’t work. As I walked the dog and breathed in this cool, breezy, and beautiful August day {basically unheard of in Texas} I decided that I didn’t want to feel scared and weak. I wanted to feel strong.

I know the type of strength I need to press forward can only come from the Lord. He has poured it lavishly on me in the past, and in my weakness I know that He will be strong again. So once again, I laid it down…opened my hands…and asked forgiveness for my lack of faith. And then, I breathed in His strength. I long for the day when I learn this lesson for good.

Blessed am I.