Another match bites the dust.


Failed adoption match jokes…probably not cool.


As you’ve probably been able to gather from the title of this post, the match we were considering is a no go. After waiting what felt like an impossibly long time for the doctor to get back with us {one week and two days, to be exact} we were told that FDA regulations would not permit the clinic to transfer these embryos, thereby making them ineligible for us to adopt.

Insert a little confusion on our part as well as the agencies, more questions and e-mails, and an answer that semi-clarifies what the issue was and you are all caught up to where we are now.

We don’t totally understand why the “issue” is an issue, or if our agency should have caught it before presenting us with the match. I’ve done a bit of research on it, but for now I think we are just trusting that the checks and balances of the agency and doctor have done what we needed them to do and prevented us from moving forward with a set of embryos with which we couldn’t have completed a FET.

So we are back in matching.

I so appreciated the director of the Snowflake Program, who has been nothing but helpful and encouraging throughout this process…and especially in the dilemmas and questions that presented themselves through this last match. When it fell through she spoke truth and peace into our adoption process, and that meant a lot to me.

At the same time, I so did not appreciate my doctor’s office…so I’m trying to sort through all of that now. While I did feel like he could have looked over the embryo information and gotten back with me in a much more timely manner {I had explained multiple times that we were supposed to make our decision within the time frame of one week, if at all possible} I also understand that he is a doctor running a busy medical practice. That part I will probably have to get over. The part that I am having trouble with are the interactions I’ve had with some of the ladies working in his office. This last go-round, I felt as she wasn’t following through with what she said she would do and was being very short with me. {She being the woman who was supposed to be the go-between the doctor and I…}

I think it boils down to this: once we match with embryos, we will be giving these people large sums of money. Sums of money nearing $5,000 a pop. So I feel like, for that sum of money, we should get quality customer service.

We’re not mad that the doctor pulled the plug on this match, and we feel like he helped clarify some confusion with the first match we were presented. Although I do have a few doubts starting to pop up when I think of him specifically, I am thankful for the help he has given us so far.

All that to say, I’m not really sure what to do with the whole doctor situation. I think Chris will go along with whatever I feel is best in that regard, so long as neither of us has to do further medical testing {were we to try and switch doctors.} Needing a lot of discernment in this area, and probably a little space from the frustration that built over the past week or so.

We weren’t devastated when the match fell through, which was probably another sign that this wasn’t the match for us. Still not totally sure what we will feel when we find the match God has for us…praying now that we will be watchful, but not guardedthat we will feel conviction, and not anxietyfor unity of heart and mind.

That’s where we’re at…and honestly, it’s not a bad place to be. I want to be right smack in the middle of God’s perfect will with this embryo match, so I can wait it out. {I may just have to repeat that over and over to myself in the coming days…you know me!}

Blessed am I.


2 thoughts on “Another match bites the dust.

  1. Praying girl! God has the perfect match and perfect timing. I can’t wait to watch it all play out. I am sure he will leave us all with our jaws dropped in astonishment. Hugs!

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