One Week & One Day Later

May 8, 2014

I’m posting this after the fact…so even as I write this, I’m not sure if I’ll be posting it after I say “We’re matched!” or to say that we had a family interested in matching with us, but didn’t feel it was a fit for us.

Either way…today, at this moment, we have a family who has chosen us.

{Insert me doubled over doing a lot of deep breathing while alternately eating the cookies Chris automatically started making.}

After being ‘in matching’ for exactly one week and a day, we got an e-mail with a “Dear Adoptive Parents” letter, family bio, and medical history from a family that is interested in placing their embryos with us.

I knew this embryo adoption business moved at a faster pace than traditional adoption, but wow.

It’s incredible and terrifying and overwhelming and mind-boggling and about a hundred other emotions all at once.

When the e-mail came in I texted a prayer warrior friend of mine and asked her to start praying. The initial information presented in the e-mail wasn’t quite what we had been hoping for {as far as the amount of time the embryos had been frozen, etc}, so I knew we would need God’s wisdom and peace as we decided how to move forward. I didn’t open any of the attachments until I was at home and with Chris. {He thought I was joking when I said we already had a request for a match…I can’t get it through his head that this process could go really quickly!}

We read through their letter & biography, reading aloud snippets that caught our attention or interested us. Their biography & letter sounded just like they were talking to us…although surreal, their words felt comfortable and it was obvious that they are a loving family. Right or wrong, I think we were both holding our breath waiting to see the pictures at the end of the writing. They were beautiful, all of them…and the little children were precious, one of whom has a lot of the same features that I do. {I may or may not have pulled one of my childhood pictures up right next to hers…It turns out they are even from the same area Chris was born / spent his childhood years in.

Of course by the pictures I was crying, the thought of it all just so overwhelming and wild.

After a few more minutes of talking…and honestly, of freaking out a little…we decided to hold off on telling anyone else right away. Moments like that are a lot to process, plus there was a bit of research that I needed to do on the stage of the embryos. We stepped away from the conversation for a few minutes…both needing some space to breathe and think.

*****

May 9, 2014

My first thoughts when I woke up this morning were the names of the couple who chose us. I fell asleep praying for them, I woke up thinking about them. It’s so weird to have names and faces…definitely makes it more real.

Today we played phone tag back and forth from work while we tried to keep working our way through this. Chris was still feeling ‘weirded out’ by the whole thing, not sure if we should agree to the first presented match…so we decided to talk to a couple of people who know who have adopted to see if what we’re feeling is normal. The coworker/friend that I spoke to was really helpful…I thought it was funny when she shared that her biggest panic was when she found out she was pregnant with her 6th child. It reminded me that some struggles aren’t specific to adoption, they are specific to parenting…and that even though I have been processing and preparing for this exact moment, Christ apparently hasn’t.

Typical. 😉

Chris called and talked to his ‘mentor’ {I’m calling him that; they would probably hate it! Ha!} who, God bless his soul, said exactly what I needed him to say. Basically, he told Chris that a) this was an answer to prayer, not a complication or unwanted ‘advance,’ b) there was nothing wrong with matching with the first couple if they were a good fit, and c) that he was going to kick Chris’ rear if he didn’t stop overthinking this whole thing.

After that conversation Chris sounded much more like himself. Although he still felt a little weird about the whole thing {I do too if I think about it for very long at once…not in a bad way, just in a ‘this is totally new and unknown’ kind of way.} we did decide that these could be the ones and we wanted to move forward with having the doctor review the embryo information.

****************

So that’s where we are right now. Waiting to hear back from the doctor. It’s still completely our decision, no matter what he says…and the research I’ve done looks like this is a pretty good set of embryos. I also e-mailed a bit with the Snowflake Program director who explained a bit more why she saw us as a fit {just trying to understand the process more fully!} which helped settle our nerves a bit.

Part of me hates to even write all of this. We’ve been praying for a moment like this, and I don’t want to take it for granted or sound ungrateful.

I think the main hesitation on our part is just born out of a need to catch our breath, to steady ourselves in this new reality….to see if God further confirms this particular family as the match for us.

Either way, it’s pretty amazing.

Blessed am I.

 

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One thought on “One Week & One Day Later

  1. This is all very exciting for you both! I’m praying that God will continue to guide you on this path and show you confirmations along the way. HUGS!

    waitingforbabybird.com

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